Speaking of Billionaires: Larry Ellison

SELLER: Larry Ellison
LOCATION: Glenbrook, NV (Lake Tahoe)
PRICE: $28,500,000
SIZE: 14,192 square feet, 13 bedrooms, 13 bathrooms (total)

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Speaking of billionaires with a plethora of private residences...

Large livin' software tycoon Larry Ellison usually just buys pricey properties but did all y'all read that the pathologically prolific property purchasing gazillionaire has put one of his dozen or so private residences on the open market? That's right, hunties, he did. As construction of a sprawling water front compound near Incline Village on Lake Tahoe's rustically ritzy North Shore* nears completion Mister Ellison has, apparently, decided he doesn't need for more than one Lake Tahoe compound and hoisted his 2.62-acre starter compound on the eastern shore of the lake near Glenbrook (NV) on the open market with an asking price of $28,500,000.

As best as Your Mama can surmise by a thorough but entirely unscientific assessment of property records Mister Ellison purchased the three pieces of the Snug Harbor fronting compound in two separate transactions—the first in August 2006 the second in June 2009—for a combined $15,000,0000.

Altogether, according to online marketing materials, the compound has 230 feet of lake frontage—much of it protected by jetties—and comprises 14,192 square feet of interior living space with 9+ bedrooms and nine full and three half bathrooms. A helpful birdie who works her real estate stuff in the high end Lake Tahoe marketplace parsed those figures for our additional amusement: six bedrooms and 8.5 bathrooms in the 9,242 square foot lodge-like main house; two bedrooms and two bathrooms in a separate 1,326 square foot guest house and five more bedrooms and three full and two half bathrooms in a 2,934 square foot caretaker's cottage. There's also a 426 square foot beach cabana and, near the compound's main (gated) entry, a 264 square foot office/guard house. All ten of the enclosed garage bays are finished and heated for the winter time comfort of Mister Ellison's fleet of automobiles.

Listing information states the the compound was originally built in 1997 and "completely rebuilt from the studs up in 2010." Well, it all certainly looks brand, spanking new, don't it? The lodge-luxe day-core is certainly well considered and, no doubt jaw droppingly expensive but, to be honest sugar sticks, it lacks soul. Despite the extensive and probably budget-free efforts of Mister Ellison's team of lady and/or nice-gay decorators the undeniably deluxe mansion suffers from an almost complete absence of authenticity and warmth.

Don't get Your Mama wrong, now. Mister Ellison's Lake Tahoe compound absolutely looks like a ridiculously posh and luxuriously comfortable spot to crash for a few days in the winter (to snow ski) and in the summer (to water ski). And we sincerely hope he'll invite us up for a weekend before it sells. But, as a home that reflects the idiosyncrasies and interests of its bajillionaire owner? Sadly, nay. This may not be a very nice thing for Your Mama to say but this place has all the idiosyncratic charm of a well-run and generously staffed luxury hotel. Bleh. Bloog. Blach. But, children, let's get real now. Given the handfuls of prototypically palatial abodes Mister Ellison owns all over the goddamn western hemisphere this compound in Lake Tahoe probably gets used by Mister Ellison and his wispy, impossibly young looking brunette gal pal—what?—a little more than a few weeks a year? Who knows anyways? Maybe the look and feel of a really good and frightfully expensive lodge-hotel is exactly what Mister Ellison was aiming for.

Your Mama (and every other property gossip) have details Mister Ellison's private real estate holdings numerous times so this time suffice to say that in addition to his extensive holdings around Lake Tahoe he keeps a knee buckling number of exceedingly lavish high maintenance private homes that include a modern mansion in San Francisco's posh Pacific Heights 'hood, a 23-acre Woodside (CA) compound modeled on a 16th century Japanese emperor's residence, a world-class garden compound in Kyoto (Japan) and a 249-acre spread in Rancho Mirage (CA) with a private 18-hole golf course. His portfolio also includes a healthy handful of ocean front homes, a hotel and two restaurants in Malibu (CA) and an historic Italianate mansion in tony Newport (RI) that once belonged to the illustrious Astor family. He reportedly bought the house sight unseen and plans to convert to a museum of some sort. Last year the property mad tech tycoon really blew it out of the damn real estate box when he shelled out well over half a billion bucks to acquire almost the entire Hawaiian island of Lanai.

*Mister Ellison is reported to have spent $58 millions on three contiguous lake side parcels on the North Shore near swank Incline Village that total 7.6 acres with 420 feet of lake frontage. Plans submitted to Washoe County, NV show the famously hardcore real estate baller planned to erect a colossal custom compound with more than 18,000 square feet of interior living space contained in multiple residences that include a main house, guest house, beach house, a couple of cottages and writer's cabin and a caretaker's residence. The property was planned to also have a man-made pond with an island, several waterfalls, a lake side swimming pool and spa and a clay tennis court with pavilion.

listing photos: Chase International